Hey there.

Yah yah, you don’t have to say it.  I know.

I know.

I’ve abandoned all of you.  Ok, one of you since nobody reads anymore.

Here’s the thing.  I’m going to let you in on a secret.

No, its not just that I am a brand new mom and going through a brand new mom phase.  Like, how do I balance my home, making meals, friends, baby feedings and oh yah….. my sanity.

No, its not that.

I’ve been living a double life.

I had another blog.

*GASP*

I know.  If you squinted and tilted your head you might confuse me with 007.  Almost.

Well, more people in my “real life” found out about my “internet life” and it began to bother me.  Don’t get the wrong idea.  Its not like my internet life was so much different than my real life.  It wasn’t really any different at all.  It’s just that I wanted a place the opposite of Cheers.

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I didn’t want anybody to know my name.  I even made up a name for myself.  But I made a couple of mistakes and people found out.

It was ok at first.  Some friends, even some family.  But then things went sour.  A friendship ended.  Someone I desperately didn’t want to find out did.  It got ugly and I got scared.

Again, I wasn’t doing anything wrong, I just wanted a little bit of privacy.

So what did I do?

Did I confront the situation?  Did I handle it with maturity and grace?

Nope.

I let my subscription on the internet name run out.

I hid.

But somehow that gave me freedom.

I still feel like I don’t know where to land.  But I do miss writing.  And I have had several posts written in my head for a while now.  And I desperately want to share in the cuteness overload that is my daughter.

But I also miss my annonymity and the freedom to really just say anything without fear of someone who actually knows me, know how I really feel.

Stupid really.

So here I sit on this near abandoned blog ready to type but fearful of what to say.

So I’ll stick to the basics for a while until I figure it all out.

Until then, have some cute for breakfast.  Its delicious and nutritious.

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